A happy pill

Unless you're living in the world of no social media, I'm sure you've heard of Chester Bennington's death by suicide. Every time there is a celebrity suicide, it's all over the news. People talk about it for a day and then move forward with their lives. But then there's people who can't shake it. Why? Suicide and mental Heath are touchy subjects. People don't want to bring in it up in fear of judgement or maybe glorifying it. This is a conversation that needs to happen. We need to talk. We need to destigmatize suicide (and mental health related illnesses). Maybe if there wasn't such a stigma, people wouldn't feel so ashamed admitting they want to take their own life or don't have a will to live anymore. The problem is, for those saying he had so much going for him or what about all his fans and those who loved him? You think he didn't think about them? Wrong. When a person is suicidal, they don't think about who loves them as much or cares about them or what could happen. There's a pain larger and stronger than anything else. There's a voice that can never be silenced. Or so it seems at the time. If we could start the conversation, maybe it would be easier to learn how to support someone feeling this way instead of changing the subject or staying quiet. 

And even in treatment of mental illnesses, we need to destigmatize it. I'm not saying medication is right for everyone. I'm not saying it's easy to make the choice to begin medication or that it will fix everything all of a sudden. We need to stop thinking medication isn't an option. I may be lucky because when I went on medication for depression and anxiety, we got the right mix on the second try. Some people take longer to find the right mix. All I'm saying is, medication has helped me live a "normal" life. When I began medication 4 1/2 years ago, I literally told my college roommates, I'm taking happy pills. I made a joke because I didn't want it to be awkward or for them to not know what to say. Medication has helped me avoid the above. Medication has helped me get out of bed. Medication hasn't put me in a fog or made me feel not myself. My brain is wired differently. I'm not ashamed of that. Me taking my daily dose is like someone taking insulin. 
Although this isn't easy for me to share with everyone or to bring up often, it's important for conversations like these to be started. It's important for people to know life can turn around. It's important for people to know it's perfectly fine to reach out for help. To start medication, to start therapy, to admit they don't have the will or strength in them to keep going, to continue to survive. It's important we don't let this conversation end tomorrow. It's important we continue to destigmatize mental health and not be afraid to bring up different topics and subjects in normal conversation, in television, in movies, in books. It's important to know you're not alone and you're not the only one. 

Life can turn around and be a beautiful thing. Stick around to see it blossom and to learn to appreciate the waves.

Peace.love.happiness.

the world keeps turning

I think it's important to remember the sun rises and the sun sets every day. If you can remember those two things, you can remember no matter what happens, life continues. All the good, all the bad. Each day is  an opportunity to start again. It holds the possibility to have tragic days and glorious days. There will be sunsets you can't wait for because the day has been too hard or maybe the week or month. But you need to remember the beauty in each day and each sunrise. No matter what happens, the world revolving, and we keep going.
This week is a particularly interesting week. Today marks two months since Uncle David passed away unexpectedly. Tomorrow marks nine years since Babcia passed away, and Monday marks three years since I made the move to Los Angeles. To think back two months to three years to nine years, I can tell you each time I couldn't wait for the sun to set, I always saw the sun rise the following day. For each time I wished the sunset could be delayed, it set. Life is a balance. When you can't wait for the sun to set, you need to remember those days you wished it would never set or those day you were too excited for the next sunrise.
Every bad day or week you've ever had, you have survived. Every good day has proven that good days and moments will always lie ahead. Reflecting over these few days, I've found I'm not the same I was 9 years ago, 3 years ago, and barely even two months ago. I've found strength where I've struggled before. I found comfort in remembering. I've found confidence facing the unknown. I know life can be dark, I know life can be bright. I know the two will always go together because they make you appreciate and recognize one another.

Remember, the world will keep in turning. Embrace the sunrise and the sunset each day.